have you ever tried so hard to get someone's attention just so he would notice you and pay as much attention to you as he did to others?
i do. i always hoped that i would fall sick so badly that you would show as much care for me as to your other friends.

but sometimes, i feel that im not worth for you to care so much.
because the amount of care and concern you show them is much more than mine.
even when it comes to how horrid my family affairs are.

maybe that is why i do not tell you anything but instead keep it bottled up in my chest.
sometimes, they balled up into a tight little ball which is curled up tightly and feels as though its suffocating me, so much that i cant breathe.
it hurts so bad that i do not know what to do anymore.

i tried to share, but all i get was you telling me to ignore them.

what do i do? where do i go from here?